The Bird in the Mirror

When my buds are asleep,
Or we've had a big fight,
The bird in the mirror
Helps me feel right.

He's a cool kind of guy
On whom I depend.
The 'keet in the mirror
Is always my friend.

He always repeats
What I have to say.
My friend in the mirror
Sees it my way!

Jary

Computer Cat

Hello!
How have you keets been doing? I am just fine after my absence last Saturday. They didn't let me out again the rest of the day, but things have returned to normal.

I haven't been able to write lately because someone is always using the computer. When the young two-leggers are at school the mother uses it quite a bit. She seems to be catching up on a lot of work. I like to sit under the computer table and doze or bathe myself. When the young ones come home they are on it a lot, too, but I don't lounge about in the room when they are there. It's too dangerous -- next thing I know they'll be dressing me up in a Build-a-Bear cheerleader outfit! (It's been done before...can I have no dignity?) I gave the one boy a playful pressure with my teeth on his arm the other day to keep him in line. Next time I may not be so playful....
Grrrr....
Furby

I'm a Girl....

Sigh. They have recently "discovered" that I am a girl. They behave as if they're the first to know. I've known forever, and Geoffrey and Jary have known since I joined them in the cage 6 months ago. I hate to say it, but humans are pretty dim sometimes. Imagine not being able to tell a boy from a girl! I still like them, of course! Maybe they're just naive?
Jay-Jay

Turner Replies

Greetings:

Just wanted to let you know that I am going to have two areas to guard: my old territory during the week and the new territory where the clothes-lines are on weekends. As to the unkind comments about me, I am above all that, having serious work to do.

The two-leggers are worried about my transition--they are so dependent on me! They have stocked up on multi-colored treats--not multi-colored parakeets! Ha! Ha! Get it, you fuzzy cat? Get it, you squeeky 'keets?

Never put down the Neanderthal age in my hearing again. It was when we made our first pact with the humans.

Yap, Yip!

Turner

Lost....And Found!

We wish to report that our friend Furby went missing on Saturday morning, but was found after several anxious hours. She had slipped out of her leash, and disappeared. Her humans were very concerned, but Furby herself did not become worried until almost lunchtime, because she was browsing at some neighborhood yard sales. However, when she began to feel hunger pangs, and did not recognize her surroundings, she almost panicked. Luckily, after a few minutes of random and frenzied searching, she was able to calm down. Using feline intuition, she found some familiar bushes, and meowed when she heard her name being called. All is well, and lunch was not even delayed.
G.

Birdwatching 2

(Grackle photo: www.biology.usgs.gov; Starling photo: www.nps.gov/archive/prsf)


RE: Grackles (Quiscalus quiscula) and European Starlings (Sturnus vulgaris)

Sigh....They've overseeded the front lawn, and the only obvious result is a plague of starlings and grackles! There certainly won't be any grass! These two species are rude, noisy, and rapacious. It's an affront to see them strutting about the front lawn, and they touch down in flocks of 100's this time of year. What's more, they can see us through the window, and engage in ignorant and offensive heckling! It goes like this (we'll call them Geo, Don, Rich, and Al....):

Rich: Hey! Look in there! Bunch of pretty boys!

Don: We're eating the grass seed, pretty boys!

Geo: Yeh! Yum. Yum.

Al: They're too scared to come out and have grass seed!

(We turn our backs to them.)

Don: Ohhh! They're scared! Bunch of foreign birds!

Geo: Yeh! Scared!

Al: Pretty boys! Pretty boys!

Jary: DON"T CALL ME PRETTY BOY!

Al: We didn't call you pretty boy!

Geo: Al didn't call you pretty boy!

Rich: You are though!! Sqwack! Squack! Squawk!

The whole flock laughs!

Despicable! Accused of being an immigrant by a European starling! There are so many of them, and they are outside the glass. Nothing to do about it, except ignore them. It's hard to be cultured and intelligent in a world of arrogant morons.

Geoffrey

The Dreaded Vacuum Cleaner

She's at it again. The older female has developed one of her intermittent manias for cleanliness, and is stalking about the house cleaning. It puts her in a very bad mood, which is only intensified by use of the VACUUM CLEANER! She claims to hate vacuuming, and we wish she would only follow her inclination and stop doing it. She has two machines! A large one that bumps about making an ungodly noise (And cleanliness is supposed to be next to godliness...) The other is small, has a high-pitched scream, and is used exclusively to clean our cage and the area around it. We hate it. We fly to the furthest bedroom, look out the window at the grackles, and try to forget. She is particulary intolerant of our shed feathers at the moment, but the younger humans are in her sights too. They are being required to "pick up their clutter", and "decide what to get rid of". We will not get rid of any of OUR toys--we need them all! So don't ask! We'll all be glad when fall housecleaning is over, and she returns to sanity!
Geoffrey

Lucky Bird!

To be sung to "This Land is Your Land!"

I am a lucky bird!
I have a warm cage!
I have a play gym...
And a loving family!
My wings are not clipped!
I have a blue-feathered friend!
And there's millet for Geoffrey
And for me!

Musically,
Jary

Two Leggers

Dear Furby:
You sound as if you have a real problem with your "two legger" young. Sometimes. the youngest one here walks us around holding on to our tails, thus preventing us from taking flight. She claims we like it.... She is also the one who has proposed that a leash be purchased for outdoor trips. We do have a defense that you do not--we can fly out of reach. One of our favorite places is the top of door frames. We spend hours there when she has friends over.
Cheers!
G.

Faith

I see "Nature" on the breakfast table as I fly through the kitchen most mornings. (That's the reason I've developed the habit of landing on the table....the frosted cornflake bits are attractive, too.) I have been following the reportage on the "Intelligent Design vs. Evolution" debate in various school districts. I've always felt that humans would be more accepting of evolutionary theory if they could identify a Tyrannosaurus rex as a potential ancestor rather that an Australopithicene. I have only to look at my feet to know that I am really a dinosaur! When they look at their feet, they see...foot fungus.

Scientists shouldn't be dismissive of faith. After all, for most humans, accepting the scientific explanation of reality requires strong faith. Very few humans know theoretically or actually how the common electrical devices in their homes work. I don't understand HTML, yet I write this blog!

Geoffrey

Breaking and Entering?

We have been accused of a crime and denied access to the master bedroom. Our crime? Pooping on the window sill, eating and manhandling the Christmas cacti in the window!
First of all, we didn't do it. We are innocent. It is clear that other birds (probably grackles) came through the open window, and are responsible for the damage.
Secondly, since when is eating Christmas cactus a crime? It is a delicious, healthful vegetable. Eating it shows good taste and an effort to keep to the government's recommendation that we all get "Five a Day".
Lastly, if you eat, you poop. That is physiology, not a punishable offense.

Geoffrey, Jary, and Jay-Jay

"Step Up"

I "Step Up" at your command,
And hop on the finger or the hand.
If you had a little more insight,
You'd take care to be polite.
It's the only trick you know,
But it's not fun for me, and so,
When "Step up" is proffered,
A treat should be offered!
Give me something crisp and yummy
After all, you've poked my tummy!

Sigh...
Jary

More from Furby

Hello Jary, Geoffrey, and Jay,

Today when the two oldest two-legger children left for school, the bigger one left his bedroom door open! I usually can't get in there during the night and get to the high window, so I got up there right away! I watched some birds fly around. These birds were NOT as intelligent as you -- they just screeched a lot, making a lot of noise like those dogs I mentioned.

Later in the morning one of the shorter two-legger children brought me a stuffed snake to play with. I hid under a blanket that was draped over the side of his bed. I almost got it, but it was yanked out of my grip. Then he picked me up and made me run with two legs down the hallway. The smallest two-legger played with me, but got bored, and I got away!

I like being friends. Hope you agree!

Sincerely,
Furby

Birdwatching 1

Subject: Turkey Vultures (Cathartes aura)
(PGC Photo/Jacob Dingle @ www.pgc.state.pa.us)

We have a personal and scientific interest in other birds, and take every opportunity to add another individual to our "life list". A bird needs a hobby, especially when they forget to open the top of the cage in the morning, and you end up spending the day sitting on your perch looking out the window.

Today, I'd like to report on the local turkey vultures, which are starting to congregate on the cell phone tower in the field behind the house. Sometimes, in the winter, there 50-60 vultures out there, sunning themselves, drying wings, and keeping a weather eye out for anything dead that happens along. They are remarkable fliers, and you'd think any bird that can fly that well would be a beauty! Up close though--moth-eaten, dusty, malodorous....tsk, tsk.

I append a poem (not by me):

Sitting on the roof ridge
On garbage day,
Drying his wings in the sun,
A nightmare chicken,
Unwanted, unloved.
But when he takes to the sky,
And plays above the wind gusts,
Balancing in the cold clean air;
Hearts ache to fly with him.

As poetry, it's not my cup of tea, but the price I pay to have one of the flightless ones act as my sub-editor.
Geoffrey

Turner's "Territory"

Dear Furby:
Thank you so much for writing back to me. I agree with you regarding Turner. He appears to be an aggressive Neanderthal. For his information, Jary and I have visited his so-called territory on many occasions. We particularly enjoyed landing on the clothes lines in the laundry room while the flightless ones gave fruitless chase. There are still probably some bird poops in a dusty corner. Maybe he can locate them.
Jah! Jah!
Geoffrey

Furby Replies!

Dear Geoffrey,

How nice of you to want to have an online friendship! I hope you your meal was to your liking. You look quite interested in it. I looked at your picture while I ate my meal today.

I have been so bored lately. The largest of the two-legged creatures I live with always leaves early in the morning and comes home around supper time. But for the last two weeks, the four younger two-leggers have also been gone much of the day. I never thought I'd miss their manhandling! I tried following the only remaining one around, meowing at what I hoped were opportune moments, but she just got a string and half-heartedly wiggled it for me for a few moments. I enjoyed reading about how you like to fly close to the heads of two-leggers in your home, just to see the hair rise a little. Sounds like fun.

This Turner sounds rather uppity...but I wouldn't mind meeting the squirrels he mentions. They sound rather more friendly...and interesting. His sign off -- "Yip! Yap!" tells it all. He's just like all those dogs that I pass when I'm taken for a walk. They make a lot of noise and run back and forth, or try to break through glass doors to get out, or nearly strangle themselves to look like they are doing something useful. Rather like politicians. I am of a more scientific turn. I OBSERVE (and do it quietly), consider the situation, and then take action.

Love,
Furby

Introducing Turner

Hello:
As a new member of the family, I would like to introduce myself. My name is Turner. I am a Chinese pug dog. I would like to comment on the "Detente" post. Detente is all very well for the lower orders, such as birds and cats. However, dogs know that territorial concerns are paramount. I mark my territory daily. My humans facilitate this by providing plenty of fresh water. They are definitely enablers, except of course, when they invite squirrels onto the porch territory, and when they entangle my lead in the exhaust pipe of an SUV. (Wheww! I thought I'd never get loose!)

So, Furby, Geoffrey, Jary, and Jay, take this as a friendly warning, and stay off of my turf!

Yip! Yap!
Turner

Free Flight

The flightless ones engage in all sorts of painful-appearing contortions to maintain fitness. I see them running, biking, and power-walking on the front street. The oldest one here used to do "push-ups" and "sit-ups"--an amusing sight. Luckily, she doesn't understand "LOL" in keetspeak. Lifting weights and doing aerobics are also said to be popular, often in places called "fitness centers". They even get into the water, and propel themselves through it--"swimming", they call it. We don't swim (When very young, Jary inadvertantly landed in a toilet and nearly drowned), although we like to take baths. Our exercise of choice is flying. We like to do it in formation, and it is even more fun if we skim over the heads of the flightless ones, creating a little lift of the hair as we pass. We like to land on the tops of door frames and curtain rods--tantalizingly out of reach! I think that wing clipping should never be allowed--although some humans defend it for safety reasons. How would you like someone to cut your legs off at the knee and say, "It's safer if you don't walk around. Sit in the house all day, and watch TV."?

Cage, Sweet Cage...

I love my comfy cage!
The mirror and the swing;
The wood and concrete perches;
The bell I like to ring.

The lettuce and the seed dish;
The toys I bite and chew.
I think my roommates like me,
At least they say they do!

I love my roomy cage!
It's permanent, I'm hope'n.
Just know that we like fly'n free
And want our cage top open!

Hint, Hint,
Jary

Detente

I believe that we will never achieve world peace unless we start reaching out to others--even those of whom we have every reason to be suspicious. I have been approached by a feline lady, who, though belonging to a group of dangerous predators, shows every sign of wishing to extend the paw of peace! Her overtures have been emphatically rejected by my colleagues, but I wish to reciprocate her offer of friendship. I think meetings scheduled around mealtimes are not prudent so early in our relationship, so I would propose an "on-line" friendship only, as a way of testing the sincerity and good-will of both parties. So, Furby, please re-contact me!
Cordially,
Geoffrey

PS: I append a recent photo of me at dinner, in acknowledgment of hers.

The Spider and the Fly

Geoffrey is seriously considering setting up a date with Furby! He doesn't seem to have noticed that Furby is a CAT! I think he stopped reading after "....birds as handsome as you." This is a disaster. I hope he reads this (abridged) poem. CHEEP! CHEEP! CHEEP!
Jay-Jay

THE SPIDER AND THE FLY
By: Mary Howitt

Will you walk into my parlour?" said the Spider to the Fly,
'Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy;
The way into my parlour is up a winding stair,
And I've a many curious things to shew when you are there."
Oh no, no," said the little Fly, "to ask me is in vain,
For who goes up your winding stair can ne'er come down again."
.........

"Sweet creature!" said the Spider, "you're witty and you're wise,
How handsome are your gauzy wings, how brilliant are your eyes!
I've a little looking-glass upon my parlour shelf,
If you'll step in one moment, dear, you shall behold yourself."
"I thank you, gentle sir," she said, "for what you 're pleased to say,
And bidding you good morning now, I'll call another day."

The Spider turned him round about, and went into his den,
For well he knew the silly Fly would soon come back again:
So he wove a subtle web, in a little corner sly,
And set his table ready, to dine upon the Fly.
Then he came out to his door again, and merrily did sing,
"Come hither, hither, pretty Fly, with the pearl and silver wing;
Your robes are green and purple -- there's a crest upon your head;
Your eyes are like the diamond bright, but mine are dull as lead!"

Alas, alas! how very soon this silly little Fly,
Hearing his wily, flattering words, came slowly flitting by;
With buzzing wings she hung aloft, then near and nearer drew,
Thinking only of her brilliant eyes, and green and purple hue --
Thinking only of her crested head -- poor foolish thing! At last,
Up jumped the cunning Spider, and fiercely held her fast.
He dragged her up his winding stair, into his dismal den,
Within his little parlour -- but she ne'er came out again!
.......

Contacted by an Admirer?

Hello Keets!

My name is Furby. I'm just over one year old. I've been enjoying your blog immensely and find it very interesting. I've enclosed my picture. While I have no feathers, my fur is soft and silky with tortoise-shell highlights. My favorite activity is sitting on windowsills watching the native birds fly about and listening to their songs. I've never seen birds as handsome as you, however.

My two-legged companions (there are six) put me in a harness attached to a long clothesline when I am outside, but, Houdini-like, I have escaped several times. When outside I enjoy sitting and watching the world go by. It is most fun when hiding under a bush. Unseen, I can see how other creatures really behave. Sometimes one of my two-legged companions will take me for a walk. I will walk a bit, especially in shady areas, but when I sit down to observe more closely, she always picks me up and carries me. I am glad to be carried when noisy things with four round legs go by. They are so big, and could cause damage to lil ol' me, I think. The youngest of my two-legged housemates sometimes naps in the afternoon, like I like to do. When she does so I try to keep her company. We lay side-by-side on her bed. She is nice and toasty.

I'm afraid my diet differs from yours -- two bowls of nutritionally-sound kibble and fresh water daily. It does get a tad boring. A little variety would be welcome.

I'd like to meet you all in person. Perhaps we could arrange a time and place to rendezvous? Perhaps for dinner? Let me know.

Love,
Furby

My Profile Picture

I've received several catty comments about my profile photo. I admit, it was taken over 2 years ago when I was younger and perhaps more handsome. In my defense, I've observed that approximately 9 out of 10 profile photos are not contemporary--and always optimally attractive. I want to put my best claw forward--especially if any television producers are following this.
Comments are closed.
Geoffrey

In Praise of Millet.....

Millet is a wondrous grain,
Full of yummy seeds.
The lucky 'keet that eats it
Will do mighty deeds!

Millet is a healthful grain.
Give it every day!
Vets who say it makes 'keets fat
Are wrong! That's what I'd say.

Proudly,
Jary